How to Gain the Upper Hand in a Negotiation
Written by Dave Bailey
Written by Dave Bailey, Nov 05, 2024
I’m often brought in to support CEOs during high-stakes negotiations.
It’s incredibly fun, especially when you’re on the outside, free from the emotions involved.
Over the years, I’ve seen how the right planning and preparation can make a huge difference.
Today, I want to share three key principles to help you flip the script and take control in your next negotiation.
1) Preparation Is Power
Many CEOs don’t know exactly what they want from the negotiation.
And if you don’t know exactly what you want, you definitely won’t get it.
Before you even step into the room, answer these questions:
- What do you truly want? Define your aspiration as specifically as you can.
- Why is your proposal fair? Use external benchmarks and first-principles thinking.
- What’s the advantage of a long-term partnership? Highlight benefits that go beyond the immediate deal.
2) Information Is Advantage
For a deal to happen, it needs to be better than both parties’ alternatives and aligned with their interests.
The more you know about their interests and alternatives, the stronger your position.
- What are their real interests? Understand the reasons behind their requests.
- What are their alternatives if this deal doesn’t happen? There is always an alternative.
Note: Be cautious about revealing your alternatives, they might use them against you.
3) Refocus Their Attention
All negotiation strategy boils down to one fundamental idea.
Strategically focus them on your aspirations and their interests and alternatives.
Of course, their optimal strategy is to do the same to you—so stay sharp.
- Align what you want with their interests
- Position your deal as better than their alternative
- Imply you have alternatives (but don’t feel obliged to reveal them)
Power lies with the party who has better alternatives.
Next time you’re in a tough negotiation: prepare your case, research any information gaps, and highlight how your offer meets their interests and beats their alternatives.
That’s how you position your proposal as a win for everyone.
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Originally published Nov 5, 2024, last updated Jul 19, 2026.
